Every Man is Different
Being a FWB(Friend With Benefits) can get complicated. You might find yourself wondering if he cares about you the way you care about him. The truth is that, while you might get a better idea of what his behavior means after reading this article, you can't know for sure what he's thinking or feeling without asking.
Every person is different. And every relationship they have will be different. So, do guys really care about their FWB? The answer is: sometimes.
Your man might love and respect you as a friend with benefits, but still not want anything more. That doesn't mean something is wrong with you. It just means that you two aren't a great match.
You might be in a situation where he's stringing you along without realizing the damage he's causing. If he sends you mixed signals and you feel confused or hurt, the best thing you can do is dump him.
Wondering What He Thinks? Talk to Him
If you find yourself wanting more from your FWB, you should talk to them. It might be hard but ending the relationship could be the healthiest path forward for both of you.
Think about why it matters to you that he cares. Do you want a long-term relationship? Do you want him to meet your family?
Entering into an exclusive or a more serious relationship is something that both partners must consent to. You can't assume that things are exclusive without talking to your partner about it. And even after, you have to consider if you can trust him.
Does he follow through with what he says? Or do you get the sense that he just says what he thinks you want to hear so you'll continue to let him sleep with you?
Sleepovers: A Slippery Slope
You might think that the gateway to intimate feelings is sex, but sleeping over after the deed is done could be the demon responsible for your attachment. If he asks you to stay and cuddle, it could be a sign that he's caught some feelings, even if he won't admit it.
More often than not, we feel things without fully processing or accepting our own experience. If your man isn't in tune with his own emotions, he could be sending mixed signals without meaning to.
Know that napping together isn't something that friends do, it's something that couples do. And if this intimate time together is causing a snag in your no-strings relationship, you might need to cut it out.
How to Tell if He Cares About You
Here are a couple of behaviors that might indicate if your friend with benefits cares about you or not.
He wants to spend more time outside of the sheets together. If someone wants to spend quality time with you, it means they genuinely enjoy your personality. And if you notice that he frequently asks you to spend time with him or do fun things together, it's a sign that he cares about you.
If you find yourself asking him to do things with you and him shying away, he's probably not as interested or invested as you are.
Gift-giving is another sign of affection. If he does thoughtful things for you (without you asking him to), he's showing that he cares. Does he buy you takeout unprompted? Does he remember what you like? If the answer is yes, he probably cares.
People listen to - and remember - information that their brain deems important. If he remembers old conversations and brings them up, it means he found those details important. Especially if he remembers details that are very personal to you, it means you are important to him.
If you notice that he's always asking the same questions, struggles to remember plans, or acts surprised about the information you already told him, the chances are that he doesn't mentally flag that information as important. If you find yourself caring for someone careless, you should exit the relationship.
Take note of the things you talk about. If you see him sharing personal and important things about his life, it shows that he trusts you. The people we trust are important to us.
If you only ever share memes and make small talk, or no talk at all, he probably isn't interested in getting closer.
Where's the Line Between Friends and Benefits?
Sometimes the boundary between friends, FWB, and a couple are blurry. Especially when you're sleeping with someone who already cares about you as a friend, it can be hard to know how someone feels about you through their actions.
Try to take note of how their behavior has changed throughout your relationship. This might provide some insight into how they feel.
The only way to clear things up completely is to talk to them. Communicate with your partner about how you feel and ask them how they feel. Find a solution that works for both of you.
If you start to feel like you're the only one trying, you should probably find someone else.